Thursday, May 15, 2014

What Does Your Husband See When He Comes Home From Work?

Before I married, I heard a story of a older lady whose Pastor stopped by for a brief moment one afternoon. As the clock ticked close to 5 p.m., she stood and said, "Forgive me for ending our conversation, Pastor, but my husband will be home shortly and I always take the last 15 minutes of my day to freshen up for him."

That resonated with me.

It seems as though dignity in marriage has been lost. It has become common for women to let themselves go once the wedding vows are spoken. No longer is it necessary to behave and dress like you did prior to marriage because hey, you got him, right? Some stop shaving their legs regularly. Those who once wore make-up toss it in their make-up bag. Daily showers are replaced with "whenever I feel like it" showers. Bodily functions are on display. And no attention is given to how they keep themselves. This is so far from how it should be.

There is no dignity or nobleness in that couch-potato attitude.

Now, I'm not saying we have to look like we stepped off the pages of a magazine all the time. Marriage is a bare-all relationship where every flaw and blemish is exposed to the other, and there will be plenty of days when the worst comes seeping out. That's where commitment comes in. My husband has seen me sick, pregnant, and definitely not looking my best numerous times. He has come home to me in sweats with no make-up, unwashed hair, and pale with fatigue. I definitely don't greet him at the door wearing pearls and a cute apron, though the thought sounds really nice. :) However, I do try to put an effort into my appearance, not because I'm afraid he will lose interest in me, but because I desire to show him I care about my job as his wife and the mother of his children. I wear jewelry, even if it's small. If I don't want to wear make-up, I at least wash my face and dab on a little lip balm, concealer, or eye shadow. I try to have my hair looking somewhat presentable and not that "I-rolled-out-of-bed-5-minutes-ago" look. In short: I try to look appealing and desirable for him. Because I love him and I respect him.

How we act and dress reflects our attitude and how we feel on the inside. If we lounge around in sloppy clothes each day and don't bother with perfume or hairspray, then it shows that we don't value our position very highly. If we never bother looking decent or presentable at home, but make sure to get nicely dressed if we go out, then we are sending the message to our husband that we care more about our appearance in front of others than with him. It's important to carry ourselves with ladylike dignity in a world that is so drastically opposite, and to represent our husband and our Savior well. We should be striving to be women of Christ-like set-apartness who demonstrates the peculiar, beautiful, and noble life of those who have been redeemed by Jehovah God.

There's a little food for thought for you today. If you are a wife, join me in pursuing an attitude of noble character and beauty in your marriage. Let your husband see a smiling, put-together woman who is happy to see him when he walks through the door. :)


Mary Renee said...

My mom always did this when I was growing up. We would to a 15 minute quick pickup and get "presentable".

I don't necessarily do this during the school year. (We both come home and get comfortable as quickly as possible. haha)
However, when I'm home all day during the summers, I try to make it a point to look nice when he walks through the door.

Sarah @ The Gospel at Home said...

I was convicted about this several years ago and try my best to look nice. Now that my son is here it can be a little harder, especially pregnant, but I try my best. I think my husband appreciates it, though he often says he doesn't care. The funny thing is, I find him attractive in his sweatpants - which he wears all the time at home! Lol.

Rebekah Elaine said...

Thank you for sharing this! Even though I am not married or in a relationship yet, I have tried to do this for my parents and siblings. I used to get up in the morning and go to bed in the evening without changing, taking, a shower, washing face, etc.

I then got convicted because my older sister was doing the same thing, and when I saw her get dressed up for her friends, it made me feel of lesser value. Like I wasn't worth looking nice for.

I want to look well for my family to show them that I respect them, love them, and I want to look good for them. I really appreciate this post because it's another encouragement for me to keep going in this habit.
Thanks Again!
~Rebekah T.


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